Inside an Overthinker's Mind
Overthinking is a major struggle to make things around you just perfect, mostly. For me, overthinking has always been about continuous thoughts about everything altogether. Honestly, it never helped me but made the matters worse.
Always being liked & not hurting others used to be my aim. I was scared of not having friends and being alone for the rest of my life. Like, seriously? I would not like sipping margaritas alone on a beach or maybe love it. Years back, life without friends was scary.
Moving back to the times when I was in high school...
I would wake up in the morning all set to go to school. Would giggle and laugh and make fun of common trends, which I never really understood. Hoping to be surrounded by people all the time, I forgot what it is to have one's own ability to stand out.
Standing out or not matching with someone's opinion felt like a brave step. A step I was too scared to take. Pretty much making yourself likable was the ultimate goal. And when I would get into fights or others would be displeased with my behavior, I would torture myself by thinking, "how could you say that? why did you say it? what if they don't talk to you anymore?"
A series of thoughts made me question myself, always. Thinking about the future and forgetting to live in the present has been my biggest mistake. Little did I know, years later I would change so much.
Being a lazy potato, lost in my thoughts to writing everything down and exploring new areas, my life changed drastically.
"Life is too short to think about what MIGHT happen"
Overthinking and overanalyzing stopped me from performing my daily chores. Talking to my parents would be a huge task for me, left alone studying or doing anything else. Thinking all day is the same as working out all day. One tires you mentally and the other physically. You just get tired and have no motivation do to anything else. I understand that.
But, as years passed by and friends became less important. I realized life is so much more than just making others happy. Because all these years I have suffered in silence, making sure they like me when I stopped liking myself. My biggest mistake.
I am happy now, knowing my love for myself is much greater than anything else. I wish, I knew it sooner. Nevertheless, it is all that matters now.
Overthinking is not a problem, it is not something that needs 'treatment'. Overthinking is something you need to do with a proper direction. Don't let your thoughts drive you crazy, you drive your thoughts towards 'meaningful thinking' or 'solution-based thinking'. Think as much as you want, but don't let your mind criticize you for who you are.
Try, aim high but do not force perfection. Be who you are. Do not let the world define how you are supposed to live. Do what makes you happy, it is YOUR life. You are responsible for it.
I won't say that I don't overthink now. I do, obviously. The only change I have made is that I do not let it drive me crazy. I have not given my mind the power to treat me as someone who doesn't fit in. I no longer think about what would happen if I do this or that. I focus more on the present.
I know, the journey is never easy. You might be facing problems, you might be trying hard to move forward, just keep hustling because all you have to do is love yourself before anything else.
More power to you!
Hustle a little, overthinking can be both, a problem and a cure. Pick what you choose to make it.