“Ipsita, I find you approachable. I appreciate how you seize the opportunity to make everyone feel welcome. It is comforting. I never knew I’d form a bond this close with someone.”
This isn’t the only compliment that has come my way recently. But it stands out because it came from someone very particular about the people they let into their lives. I have been complimented on how I make everyone feel welcome and create an atmosphere of fulfilling engagement. It often makes people categorise me as an extrovert. The truth is for the past couple of months, I’ve been observing. This isn’t unusual, but I try not to let my judgments cloud my observations.
I’ve been relying heavily on understanding humans and how they function—not for some study or research purpose, but to ensure that they feel included. I’ve been living in a space that isn’t my home, is culturally very different, and made me feel like an outsider when I first arrived. Even back home, there were spaces that left me feeling uncomfortable, preventing me from being the best version of myself. It might have something to do with Delhi’s culture, but I’m still trying to piece the puzzle together. Perhaps my experiences have driven me to ensure that others don’t feel left out. That could be one of the key factors behind my drive to create an inclusive environment.
Let me bring a point of introspection here—How do you think people add value to your life? You can delve into how their life experiences shape your view towards things or how interacting with someone for the first time showcases your confidence in similar situations. Does human interaction allow you to understand a part of yourself? Does it help you learn and grow? Just think about it.
For me, it comes with its own challenges, you know? It isn’t always easy to maintain an approachable environment. More often than not, creating a space for vulnerability can affect your emotions too. The idea of setting strict boundaries comes with time. Until then, you’re left to regulate a huge chunk of emotions even after the conversation is over. It can be draining at times, but I find fulfilment in knowing the impact a conversation has had on someone. I can visually differentiate the sigh of calmness after someone opens up and the sense of relief they feel. I know how hesitant they are in the beginning, but everyone needs a listener sometimes, right? I’m sure you do too because I know I do.
Let me share a recent experience with you and how it impacted my thought process. All of us were sitting in the courtyard after class—a ritual I follow. I invite people to join in, and we discuss random topics as a way to brush up on our communication skills, learn about diverse perspectives, and practice presenting our points of view politely. It’s like having our own community of learning. Recently, we debated some controversial issues, and the dialogues we shared created a space for vulnerability. Let me explain how it happened.
It started with us discussing LGBTQIA+ issues, sex before marriage, and then we moved on to the #MeToo movement. We talked about abuse and whether the movement succeeded in spreading awareness. During this discussion, one of the participants shared a personal experience. At first, he was reluctant, but as he opened up and saw how accepting the room was, he shared something he had never spoken about before. The emotional intensity was high, but it allowed someone to unburden themselves of something they had been carrying for a very long time. I am proud of that.
This experience made me realise that even in a progressive society, crime against men is still a taboo topic. Even in seemingly open spaces, untold stories are waiting for a safe place to be shared. This is why creating inclusive environments is not just fulfilling—it’s necessary.
I can’t write much here today; it would feel like I’m opening my jar of tips and tricks. Just kidding—that’s not it. I don’t want to exaggerate too much just yet because there’s so much more to uncover. In time, I’ll dive deeper into how creating this energy doesn’t just bring out the best in others but in me too. After all, connection isn’t just about understanding others—it’s about understanding yourself through them.
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